So here we are at the tail end of Monday and I hope this finds you well.
Let me start off by saying while I didn’t post over the past few days it wasn’t because I forgot. The reality is that I was trying to stare down my fear and anxiety for the upcoming race.
Last week, my bride and I were on a run and mid-stride it hit me that my race is this month. That realization should have excited me, but instead I fought back a panic attack. Trust me – when you’re already feeling winded hyperventilating is the last thing you want to do. In that moment a wave of fear, anxiety, and panic spread over me, but I pressed on finishing that run. What I was left with was doubt and stress wondering if I was going to be able to actually complete what I had signed up to do.
Between injury and being sick I hadn’t consistently run for weeks. For some they can just lace up their shoes and get back out there. That’s not the case for me. I’m built for comfort not speed. Lacing up and going for any distance greater that a few hundred yards is difficult for me. I wish it wasn’t the case, but it is. So, I stressed. I thought and prayed and mulled over how to approach the upcoming race and how to verbalize something I am not used to feeling.
Stress isn’t a new thing. Frankly, I tend to thrive under it. I am wired to become focused in the face of stress and bring some of my best work. But, this time it was different. This time I felt helpless, much like I have throughout my training and that was hard for me. So I pulled back on posting until I had processed through these somewhat uncharted emotional waters. And here is what I have come up with:
- I won’t give up. Yes this will be hard, but I’ve done harder.
- I put my money where my mouth is now its time to see it through.
- Because I want to cross the finish line I must plan and I don’t me keep putting one foot in front of the other. Pacing, walk breaks, water, supplements, rest, taping…
- My cheerleader will be with every step of the race – literally.
- I don’t have to focus on placing or any of that – I have to get across the finish line.
When you get down to it, these 5 points are much the same as anything else we face and when I look at it that way, I’ve been meet with success thousands of times.
So don’t give up. Don’t let fear stop you in your tracks. Keep pushing forward and you will reach your goal. Be realistic. For me – I’m looking at about a 3:36:00 time for my first half marathon. You know what, it will be my time to beat in the future (if I ever decide to run again – HAHA!) I’m prone to injury and sore muscles – so I’ll take it easy. I’ll do a run/walk pattern and cross the finish line. I’ll smile (and maybe cry), but I’ll do it, I will.
I hope you have a great Monday and happy training!
Remember, we are ordinary people trying to live extraordinary lives.